Why some children are so angry, and how to deal with it

Being a parent breathes a whole new light on how you try to understand children. There were times, that I would bend over backwards to make a child happy when they looked anything but happy. Now, I find myself looking at my own children through a prism. I can hear the inflections in their voice, the annotations in their actions, and the other subtle moods and actions that you wouldn't notice otherwise.

I see alot of me in my children, which bring up a wave of emotions that I thought were successfully suppressed. Try to put yourself into their shoes, like the first day of school, moving to a new neighborhood, divorce or marriage, death of family members, and/or financial issues that affect their immediate family. If you look at your daily lives and reflect on what influenced your emotions. Take that feeling an add a lack of understanding and you are only scratching the surface of what our children feel.

I've found that over time, the stress level that I introduce into the house has caused more tension and emotion. After watching the effect that raw emotions had on my children, I decided to review my habits and how I can help them. In order to change, I needed to understand what they were feeling, how to help. I started listening to them, not just hearing, but listening to what they said and how they said it. I noticed that some days were better than others, and on the harder days, I started talking with them. not just speaking at them, but really trying to incorporate their days into our conversations. The more we talked, the more I started to understand what they were going through. This understanding allowed for better dialog and better relationships.

My oldest is now 13, and although I know that some of the more interesting times are yet to come, I hope that the respect brought through understanding will allow each of us to face each obstacle as a true family, With Love and compassion.